digimon tamers and deadpool
by JustAnotherNerd
Summary: Yamaki hires the merc with a mouth to battle the tamers. Will the tamers get out... or will they be driven insane by Deadpools constant ranting? Contains Rukato.
1. Chapter 1

Digimon Tamers

and Deadpool

Authors notes:

Deadpool has a healing factor, a teleportation belt and is armed to the teeth and can take weapons from seemingly no where. As long as they aren't megas I think it's perfectly fair. At any rate, this takes place like, immediately after Cables death, and sometime when the tamers have only ultimate levels. Please enjoy.

Chapter 1 Deadpools new job

Wade sat on the couch.

"Oh dear lord, I thank you for this bountiful meal of Burger King meals. Whoppers, Fries, and Chicken fries for Bob. I also hope you will get me a new job to kill some poor sucker in order make cash, or let me do right for Cables sake. Praise Jezuz. Amen." (Authors note: It's ok for me cause I am Catholic).

Ring.

"Thanks."

"Is this Wade Wilson? The merc with a mouth Deadpool?" Said a man with a Japanese accent.

"Well dude, make up your mind! Do you want Wade or Deadpool the merc with a mouth?"

"Wha? Aren't you the same person?

"That is entirely beside the pie."

"You mean point?"

"DON'T TELL ME WHAT I MEANT JACKASS!"

"Well maybe I'll just find a mercenary interested in making money while helping the world!"

"All right! All right! So who are you anyway? Who do you work for? What's the job? How much?"

"My name is Mitsuo Yamaki. I work for an organization dedicated to the protection of the world against a variety of evil creatures known as digimon…"

"WHOA WHOA WHOA WHOA WHOA WHOA WHOA WHOA WHOA WHOA WHOA WHOA WHOA WHOA WHOA WHOA WHOA WHOA WHOA WHOA WHOA WHOA WHOA WHOA WHOA WHOA WHOA WHOA WHOA WHOA… Your telling me you want me to fly all the way to Japan to kill a bunch of fictional monsters whose show I happen to be a big fan of. Except that second season leader. He's a dick."

"Yeah sure whatever. As I was saying, I want you to assassinate ("POTTY MOUTH! YOU JUST SAID ASS TWICE!!") three particular digimon. They are roaming free in our area: West Shinjuku. If you accept this you… Deadpool… will be paid 1 000 000 American. And at the same time, you will be doing what your former partner would have wanted. You will be protecting the entire planet from these evil beasts."

"Sounds like an offer I can't possibly pass up. But tell… Who are you?"

"?? What? Mitsuo Yamakai!"

"Who do you work for?"

"An anti digimon organization called H.Y.P.N.O.S.!"

"What's the job?"

"Killing 3 particular digimon!"  
"How much is it?"  
"1 000 000 American!"

"And who are you?"

"Mitsuo Yamakai!"

"And who do you work for?"

"An anti digimon organization called H.Y.P.N.O.S.!"

"And what's the job?"

"Killing 3 particular digimon!"  
"And how much is it?"  
"1 000 000 American!"

"And who are you?"

"Mitsuo Yamakai!"

"And who do you work for?"

"An anti digimon organization called H.Y.P.N.O.S.!"

"And what's the job?"

"Killing 3 particular digimon!"  
"And how much is it?"  
"1 000 000 American!"

"And who are you?"

"MITSUO YAMAKAI!!"

"And who do you work for?"

"AN ANTI DIGIMON ORGANIZATION CALLED H.Y.P.N.O.S.!!"

"And what's the job?"

"KILLING 3 PARTICULAR DIGIMON!!"  
"And how much is it?"  
"1 000 000 AMERICAN YOU STUPID FREAK!!"

"WHO IS THIS!!" (Authors note: This is Deadpool. No exaggeration.)

"YOU #HEAD!! DO YOU WANT THE !#ING JOB OR NOT!!"

"Oh alright I'll take. But maybe you need to take some anger management classes mufriend."

Click.

Yamaki was left to scream out of frustration at the antics of the mercenary. Several of the people monitoring the bioemergence looked at him curiously.

"NOT ONE WORD!!"

Meanwhile in New York, Deadpool was looking at a picture of his late partner.

"Here goes. You were always one to do the right thing. Now it's my turn. Don't worry Nate. This one is more for you than the money."

"Mr. Wilson. There's just one problem with this job," Bob (the hostage friend HYDRA agent. For those who don't know him wiki him.)

"What could possibly be wrong Bob?" Deadpool answered.

"Your costume is still in shreds from your last job!."

Chapter 2: AIR TRIP!

Deadpool and Bob (in full uniform and thus getting many strange looks.) were at the airport.

"Are you sure you know what you're doing Mr. Wilson?"

Deadpool just looked at him.

"What am I saying. Of course you don't."

"Bingo," Deadpool responded.

"Well… goodbye Mr. Wilson." Bob went in to hug him. Deadpool punched him in the ribs.

"OW!"

"Don' touch me."

After several problems with all his weapons at airport security, and several issues with the guards Deadpool showed them the special license that was sent to him by Yamaki to take his weapons on board, and was finally on the plane.

"What's with the costume? You 3 or somethin'." Said the guy in front of him.

Deadpool began kicking the seat.

"WAAAAAAHHHH! WAAAAAHHHH! I WAN'T MY JUICE! I WANT MY SANDWHICH! I can keep this up for the whole fifteen hours buddy. WWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!"

And he did. Or rather, he kept it up for exactly 14 hours, 55 minutes and 39.456 seconds. They were about to land when…

"Yamaki! I don't think you'll be seeing your mercenary anytime soon!" Riley cried.

"What do you mean?"

"A digimon just bioemerged at the airport, and his plane is landing right now!"

"Perfect." He said angrily.

… the plane was rammed by a large serpent like thing. Deadpool looked out the window and stopped the whining. But he continued kicking the seat. Hey I know that thing! He thought. Hey! Where are my yellow boxes! Ah whatever. I saw that thing somewhere before. Oh yeah! The digimon emperor rode them in the second season. Damnit they never actually named it.

BAM! WHAM! BAM!

"You call those sound effects!" Deadpool said running for the door. He stopped. "Okay everyone buckle in." He opened the door and a fierce wind tried to drag everyone with him. He threw a grappling hook at the serpent digimon. And it wrapped around its neck.

"DA NANNANANANANANANANANANANA, DEADPOOOOLLL DEADPOOOOLLL DEADPOOOOLLL." He sang as he climbed up the rope. When he got on top he took both his swords and stabbed them through its neck on either side. It screamed in pain and writhed. Deadpool just clung on like crazy. He pulled out his sub machine guns and began firing at its head. It screamed and screamed.

"SHUT UP! IT DOSEN'T HURT THAT MUCH!" It fell and Deadpool let go by accident.

"Now THIS is going to hurt." He said. It had flown up past where any plane flew and he was hurtling to the ground fast.

He dialed his cellphone.

"Yamaki. Hi it's Deadpool. I'm going to be a bit la…" BAM!

"I'M HERE! MERRY CHRISTMAS MOM AND DAD! HAPPY BIRTHDAY BROTHER BILLY!" Deadpool sang as he walked in.

Yamaki turned around. "How?" was all he could get out.

"They said you fell from the plane!"

"Rumors of my death have been greatly exaggerated."

Yamaki stared at him. "You fell out of a plane."

"Yeah, so?"

"SO!? YOU FELL OUT OF A PLANE!"

"Can we move on to the actual job now?"

"But you… You know what. I don't even _want_ to know."

Well here's the beginning. My favorite anime meeting my favorite comic hero. No negative comments about the idea, or I will hunt you down as I have already said. See you next chapter.


	2. Chapter 22

Well here we go

Well here we go. Second chapter. Sorry this one took so long.

Chapter 2: Diamond Studded Deadpool

"Now are you sure all the stuff you had us buy you was necessary?" an irritated Yamaki asked his mercenary over the phone.

"I told you Rooster Crow," Deadpool said. "I need a 5 star hotel in order to think properly about my strategy. I need the plasma TV, TiVo, and, surround sound in case something I think important comes up on the news. I need the HYPNOS computer to surf the files and Internet for information. You think this stuff is just rush in, busting skulls and taking names, Rooster Crow?"

"I don't want the code name Rooster Crow. And yes I can sort of understand that. And we did promise to take care of all your expenses. But I still fail to see how all these bills for video games, gourmet meals, and a LIFE SIZE FIGURINE OF AGUMON could possibly help you, Mr. Wilson," Yamaki answered.

"The food keeps me focused, the video games are for reaserching mosters, and the figurine is for target practice," Deadpool responded.

"All the games are sports games, you can eat ordinary food for focus, and I stopped by your room the other day, and the figurine is completely untouched."

"………………… HEY LOOK OVER THERE!"

"We're on the phone."

"OH jeez! I'm gonna have to let you go! I just found important information on one of the kids on the internet!"

Then Yamaki heard something that sounded like, "I am your father."

"Are you watching Star Wars on that TV? I told you it was only for News reports that might be impor-"

"Click!"

"What?"

"Oh right the phone says click not me."

Click

The phone started ringing again. Deadpool threw it out the window.

"OW!" said a certain red dinosaur.

"What is it boy?" asked a boy with brown hair and goggles.

"Something fell on my head Takato-mon!"

"Huh? It's a phone?"

"Too bad none of my charges are here."

"Where did this come from?" Takato asked looking up.

"No where around for miles."

"Maybe it's from that open window. But who would be dumb enough, or angry enough to throw a phone out the window?"

"HEY! Stop setting up irony Digimon Tamer B.!"

"Who the heck's screaming up there?" Takato asked.

The next day Wade went down to one of his clients enemies. One Rick Nonoka. Or so the report on him said. When he knocked on the door, a young woman answered it.

"Oh hello there," she said seeming surprised at seeing a man in such an odd get up. "I'm sorry I'm strictly in the modeling business, whatever job your offering."

"I'm looking for a Mr. Rick Nonaka."

"Oh. Well that's rather strange. Why?"

"Because… I… am looking for some one his age… to… I'm selling candy, and don't like the opinion of adults."

"Ok… but I think that you meant my daughter Rika."

"No… I was… told that this customer was named Rick."

"… If she goes missing, I took your picture," the woman said suspiciously. The woman walked off. A few minutes later, a girl with a very spiky ponytail.

"Um… you don't look like a Rick."

"My name is Rika you freaky… ninja… candy salesman."

"Excuse me for just one moment."

Deadpool walked around the corner of the house, and took out his new cell phone.

"Yamaki ya idiot! It's called spell check, ever heard of it!"

"What the hell are you babbling about now Wilson?"

"This report names Rika Nonaka, as RICK Nonaka!"

"That's the water smudge you made when we were discussing your mission, that you insisted on bringing a WATER GUN to!" Yamaki explained.

"Don't make any lame excuses Rooster Crow!"

Click

"Pathetic. Making excuses for his mistakes," Deadpool said, rolling his eyes.

"You can't prove that," He said to the author.

He ran back to Rika.

"You know I heard every word you said," Rika said sarcastically.

"Oh good. Then I don't have to be discrete about this," Deadpool said. He pulled out a magnum and pointed it directly at her. This caused Rika's eyes to widen, and sweat began to drop. "All right here's the story. I'm a mercenary. I was hired by that HYPNOS place, to take out you and your friends digimon. I know how to pronounce it because I watch the show. You know just so you know."

Rika was extremely nervous staring at a gun that was placed directly in front her face. And that didn't happen very often. She thought of anything that could keep him talking to her, and not getting tempted to pulling the trigger. Clearly she didn't know Mr. Wade Wilson.

"Um… Is, that a fact?" She asked.

"Yes. Now get the monster, I have no trouble shooting children. I once shot a three year old in the leg 'casue he tried to take a toy I wanted."

That wasn't a good.

"Ok, but first, what's your name?"

"I'm Deadpool. Now let's go get that monster. Or else I'll throw a grenade in your breakfast cereal."

"I don't eat cereal," Rika said.

"Oh… well then… Hey waitaminute! Your stalling for time with stupid comments! That… is… MY JOB!!" Deadpool said. He probably wasn't actually mad. Kick!  
"OW! My head! What the hell was that?"

"That would be me," said a female's voice.

Deadpool looked up, and came face to face with some sort of fox.

"Well this is certainly awkward. Look babe, this isn't what it looks like. I have not been cheating on you," Deadpool explained.

Renamon froze.

"What?"

"I've been faithful, I would never want to shoot anyone except for your head."

"What?"

"Well, this is going no where fast is it. So I think I'll just do… this."

BANG! Deadpool had fired his gun. Renamon hardly made it out of the way. And she still felt an intense stinging on of her left arm. When she looked down there was definitely a bullet lodged into it. The pain caused her to trip over, and she had to flip herself back over with her right one only. She stopped for one second and grabbed it by reaction. Rule one when fighting Deadpool: Never ever ever pause, for any reason. In that one second, Renamon looked up and saw something metal heading right for her face. She moved to her side, and recived a cut to her right shoulder. She rolled away.

What the hell was that? This human… How did he do that? Did he just catch her off guard or… But her train of thought was interrupted by more swords heading straight for her.

"Damn…" She said. She ran, and jumped on to the roof of the house. Her eyes scanned the area for her attacker.

"And lets here it for my old friend Weasel, who designed this teleportation belt, allowing me to get behind you with the touch of a button. And now…. Istabyouwithaknife!" Deadpool cried. But having heard every word Deadpool had just said, Renamon was out of the way in record time. She jumped behind him, and kicked him off the roof, into the air.

"Hmmmm… maybe I should take that advice everyone gives me and keep my mouth shut when I'm sneaking."

"Diamond Storm," cried a voice from his right.

"That sounds like an attack. Personally I always preferred that first seasons bird thing attack… the twister thing of fire AAAAAGRHFGHARRHATGFGAGAHAGAARHAHHHHH!!" Deadpool screamed as he felt his flesh pierced by he didn't know how many diamonds, and one actually went right through his head, and his eye. He fell, and with a splash, landed in the pond by Rika's house.

Renamon grasped at her injuries, and laid down, breathing heavily.

"Renamon! Are you okay?" Rika called up to her.

"I think I'll be fine," Renamon said, nursing her wounds.

A few minutes later, after the two had calmed down, they realized the problem with what had just happened. The freaks body was still at the bottom of the pond, which would raise questions. They went to find it, but discovered that it had vanished.

"Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow ow ow ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, OWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOW!" Deadpool said, as he pulled diamonds out of his skin. The most painful was when he pulled the one that went through his head and eye. After some time, he had pulled them all out, and was gathering them up so he could sell them.

"Well, I've learned a very valuable lesson……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………… OK I lied," Deadpool said. "Let's see… Should I try the fox again? Nah to obvious. The dinosaur? Nah, makes me feel like I'm hitting myself, with all that red. Guess that just leaves the bunny… dog… thingmajigger…. What the hell is that thing? I mean I watched digimon the movie, and I coundn't figure it out. It confuses me, therefore it must die."

Well it appears Deapdools next target has been chosen. Will he win this time?

Deadpool: Yes.

…Ahem… Will we get to see some digivolution?

Deadpool: Yes.

Will we see Deadpool fight 2 digimon at once?

Deadpool: No

Will Deadpool responsd to your comments if you leave them?

Deadpool: No.

STOP SPOILING THE NEXT CHAPTER!


	3. Chapter one third

Hello world of people who can speak English

Hello world of people who can speak English! My name is Deadpool, and I'm here to talk to you about a tragic event. Digimon Tamer B., is dead. At this point in time I would like to address one Captain Deadpool who mister DTB trusted genuinely. Your taking that joke of his at the end of Digimon Generations part 2 seriously made him feel very sad, then hungry… then very drunk, then rather dead having stumbled off a building. As such, I will just have to take over this story. And I'm going to leave Generations to DTB's clone with a speech impediment.

Digimon Tamer B. Clone: Kakakakakakaka.

Deadpool: That's right big guy. "Kakakakakakaka". Now don't worry CD, I don't blame you for his death. And neither does his clone.

Right let's read as I try and fight a small rabbit dog. Enjoy.

I am owned by marvel, and a Japanese Anime company that I don't care about owns the tamers.

Chapter 3: Gun Arms V.S. Gun Wielder

"Okay, this the right building, but Yamaki forgot to fix this water mark I made, that showed the number of where the apartment where the Wong's actually lived. So there's only one way to find out."

1st Level.

Knock.

"Is this the Wong residence?"

"No."

"Goodbye."

2nd Level.

Knock.

"Is this the Wong residence?"

"No."

"Goodbye."

3rd Level.

Knock.

"Is this the Wong residence?"

"No."

"Goodbye."

4th Level.

Knock.

"Is this the Wong residence?"

"Yes."

"Goodbye."

Deadpool was about to knock on the door next to the previous one, when…

"Wait a second…"

Knock knock.

"Hello, again."

"Hi, sorry I've been in the habit of getting no's all day, hey can I speak to a mister Henry Wong?"

"That would be me," said a young boy with blue hair.

"Good then meet me on the street in about 5 minutes with the bunny dog thingy," Deadpool told him.

"What? How do you know about Terriermon?"

"Just meet me on the roof."

"I thought you wanted to meet on the street…"

"I changed my mind, hurry up and get on the roof!"

"Stupid Yamaki threatening to cut my TiVo if I didn't get back to work. So I waited one lousy month before I went after the fox, big deal. Well at least I've got those diamonds from my injuries," Deadpool said. He was looking through his sniper on a different building, waiting for Henry and Terriermon to come out. This time he just wanted to get it over with and go watch TV.

"If you had just knocked on over 60 people's doors you'd be exhausted too," Deadpool told the readers.

"Where is this guy?" Terriermon asked.

"I don't know, he said he'd be here. I don't know what he'd want though," Henry said. Then his cell phone rang.

"Hello?"

"Henry, its Rika!"

"Oh hey! How's it going?" Henry asked happily, but then he heard the panic in Rika's voice.

"I waited till today because I was in shock but, if you see a guy in a ninja outfit run for it! He tried to kill Renamon, and actually managed to hurt her, Terriermon will be massacred!"

"Hey! I will not! I'm three times the digimon that fox is!" Terriermon yelled into the phone.

Clink.

"Clink?"

They both looked down and noticed a bullet had fallen down right next to them. The clink had been when it hit the ground. They looked over at where it looked like it had come from, Henry wide eyed.

"Oh c'mon! I missed?! Just my luck I pick the building with the sun glinting in my eyes."

"Holy… Is that the guy Ice Queen was talking about?"

"Must be… Huh!"

Henry ran for it as Deadpool aimed at him again. Clink. Clink. Clink.

"Henry, just swipe digivolution, I can take him!"

Henry tripped, and fell on his stomach.

"Guh, ok, fine. Digi modify! Digivolution activate!"

Deadpool watched.

"Wow haven't seen that one in real life yet," he stated.

Gargomon looked over at Deadpool.

"Heh heh heh," Gargomon laughed, "Now you get to see how much better than that fox I am."

Deadpool stared at the giant rabbit dog.

"His guns are bigger than mine! That bully!"

Deadpool brought out his two mini machine guns.

"Well ah giss we're just gunna haf tu settle 'is like cow boys. Only with better guns, and jumping on buildings."

Gargomon leapt up and made the first shot. Deadpool teleported to the building right across from where he was just standing.

"That's no way to fire a gun! This is the way you fire a gun… AT SOMEONE!"

Deadpool held down both triggers, and Gargomon leapt to the building next to him.

"Get back here! Your head's worth a fortune to Rooster Crow!"

Deadpool jumped across from him, and they both pulled the trigger at the same time. And they both realized it at the same time. Deadpool jumped to his left, Gargomon jumped in the same direction, his right. With guns blazing, the two jumped to each building while trying to bring the other one down.

"This is going no where fast isn't it?!" Gargomon cried, and jumped over the bullets, onto same building as our fearless not so heroic mercenary.

"Well crap that's not good…"

"Bunny Pummel!"

Deadpool found himself bending the wrong way, having been punched with a machine gun as it fired green bullets, and sending him flying.

"Heh, he's not that tough at all," Gargomon stated, looking up at the red clothed dot. But then he noticed a strange glint in the sky.

"Sweet. Back's to the sun. Now I get to play with my sniper rifle for a moment," Deadpool stated.

With not much time till he fell to the ground, he picked the first part he could to fire at.

"GAAAAHH!" Gargomon screamed, and grabbed his now bleeding leg.

"Careful not to shoot your own leg off," said a voice that at that moment, Gargomon actually feared. He raised his right arm, and prepared to fire. Bam!

"GAAAHHH!!"

"My friend, my friend… You've been kicked in the nuts and then pistol whipped."

"I haven't been pi…" SMACK! Gargomon fell over, bleeding from the head having been pistol-whipped. His eyes were crossed, and he was losing consciousness quickly. Deadpool pulled out a shot gun, and pointed it at his enemy.

"One down, three to go."

Gargomon couldn't bring himself to lift either of his guns. The last thing he saw was Deadpool begin to pull the trigger.

BAM!

Well I certainly appear to have one this one haven't I. Well me and the clone will write a chapter each, right after DTB's funeral. He asked to be cremated. If you have any questions please direct them to the DTB clone, or myself, Mr. Wade Wilson. Aka Deadpool. I'll just keep use DTB's profile anyway. And I've altered that chapter of Digimon generations so that joke the late DTB left is different. See ya next time.


	4. 4 retpahC

Previously on Digimon Tamers and Deadpool:

Previously on Digimon Tamers and Deadpool:

Bob: Goodbye Mr. Wilson!

Deadpool: SHUT UP! IT DOESN'T HURT THAT MUCH!

Yamaki: The games are all sports games, you can eat regular food for energy, and I stopped by your room the other day, and the Agumon figurine was completely unharmed!

Deadpool: Digimon Tamer B. is dead.

Deadpool: My friend, my friend… You've been kicked in the nuts and then pistol whipped.

Gargomon: I haven't been p…

Whip!

Deadpool: And now the thrilling next chapter.

Chapter 4: The One with the Mysterious Voice

Deadpool was deep in thought. This was the most serious he had been since he arrived in this country. He was thinking as hard as he possibly could. The most important thinking he had done in his entire life.

"Oh… my… God!" Deadpool said aloud, realizing the most important thing he ever thought of. He had to tell Yamaki. Ring. Ring. Ri-

"Hello?"

"Rooster Crow, it's your mercenary!"

"Deadpool? This had better be an update, and you had better have actually made some progress this time!"

"Huh? Oh yeah. Well, I captured a hostage that I think could turn out useful. Knocked him out with the butt of my shotgun."

"What? Really?!"

"Yeah, but I've got even BETTER news!"

"What is it?"

"I figured out how in "Goldmember" Austin Powers is single again! If you remember after "The Spy Who Shagged Me", Austin from ten minutes ago has also come back to 2002, so in actuality we're watching that Austin! And the reason Number 2 is still alive during the second movie is…"

Click.

Yamaki heard his phone ring again. He glanced at the call display, and picked it up.

"Hello?"

"We haven't spoken in a while Yamaki. How is the mercenary holding up?"

"TERRIBLE! You told me that he was the best man for the job, but he's only got one hostage, and driving me completely insane!"

"Well… if they're not dead yet… then be glad you didn't hire some one else, because they'd be dead," the man on the other end explained to him. "Oh by the way, did you by any chance did you interrupt one of his stupider thoughts?"

"Yes just now."

"Then he's trying to call you right now. Goodbye."

Click.

Yamaki hung up himself, and heard the phone ring again. He threw it in a cupboard.

"Unbelievable! Hanging up and then not even bothering to answer when I call him back. Who DOES that?" Deadpool said to the irrate rabbit in the cage. "HEY! EAT THAT STEAK! It cost Rooster Crow a fortune! It's expensive stuff!"

"Get bent mercenary man!"

"I'm warning you, I'll use as a pair of nunchuks again to knock out your blue haired pal……… again."

Deadpool reminisced about what happened. He had told Henry that Terriermon was his hostage, and then knocked him out, by grabbing hold of one of Terriermon's ears, and smacking Henry over the head with the rabbit's body.

"That… isn't… funny," Terriermon stated, staring daggers at his captor. "Why are doing this at all? It's a lot of trouble just for money isn't it?"

"Well, it IS 1 million dollars we're talking here. Not just 100 thousand. We're talkin' BIG money."

"Mm hm. So it's all about the money? You selfish money grubbing freak…"

"Let's not use the f-word. Ever."

There was a tension between them. Terriermon angry because of what had transpired to his tamer. Deadpool lost in thought of his true face. He glanced at his clock. 11 am.

"I'm goin' for some lunch. That cage is booby trapped. Just so you know. So don't even try it."

Terriermon was just used as a weapon. He didn't doubt for even a second that the cage would explode or worse.

Stupid digimon, believing that I can actually booby-trap a… Okay, I am seriously missing my little yellow boxes right now. I'm in a foreign country, at least give me back that one familiar thing! Deadpool thought. Then he sighed.

"I need alcohol."

He looked to his right, and noticed a park.

"Hmmm… maybe a walk through the park would do me some good."

Rika was walking with Takato through the park at that moment. Rika was disguised. Her hair was long and she was wearing very plain and unnoticeable clothes. Takato, having been unseen by Deadpool, was merely advised not to wear his goggles, as Deadpool confessed he watched the show, and that would give away that he was a digimon tamer.

"… so apparently this guy heals really fast, because Renamon shot more than a dozen diamonds into his flesh and he was able to get back on his feet in no time to take on Terriermon."

"I see… And he can teleport?"

"He said that had something to do with his belt…" Rika stated, lost in thought.

"So now what do we do?"

"My advice: don't let Guilmon out until we know our next move. If this merc guy finds him… CRAP!"

Rika had just spotted "that merc guy", heading right towards them.

"…bar in the park!"

She then realized, that he might still recognize her face. Her eyes darted back and forth, and realized there was nothing else she could do but…

Deadpool walked on, lost in thought about Cable, his job, his face.

"I can't believe even in this country people don't think it's a good idea to put a bar in the park! I mean…. What the?"

He had just come across, a girl with her arms wrapped around a boy, and their faces were pressed together.

"……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………… Get a room!"

Then he started walking off, to find a bar, grab a cold one, and maybe come back for a walk, with a bottle in hand.

Rika pulled lips from Takato's, and watched as Deadpool walked away.

"That was close."

She looked back at Takato, who was the deepest red anyone in the world had ever been in the entire history of the world. Rika, coming back down to Earth, and realizing what she had actually just done, turned a little red herself.

"Uh…" said Takato.

"Don't… EVER… mention… this… again," Rika said, with eyes that said, "OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL OUT THROUGH YOUR EYE SOCKETS."

Rika walked off, and Takato muttered something or other about telling Guilmon to not come out.

Rika just kissed me… He thought, his feet taking somewhere completely automatically. Rika… I… wow… I…

He reached Guilmon's hideout, and remembered what he was actually doing. Calming down a bit, a part of him actually felt a bit proud. He had just kissed the "Queen of Digimon"! All though no one would ever hear of his accomplishment.

"Hey Guilmon! You in hear boy?"

"Here I am Takatomon!"

"Ah good! Listen, this is very important boy, okay? You can't leave this place for a while, it's very dangerous, so no matter what happens, don't come out of your hideout under any circumstance!"

"Not even to play with…" Guilmon began.

"NO. Guilmon, there's someone out to hurt you right now, and…"

BANG! A bullet wound appeared on Guilmon's tail, and he cried out in agony.

"And he's feeling so depressed right now, he actually fells like doing his job," said Deadpool. His mask was turned up slightly, so that he could drink from his bottle. He took a big gulp, and aimed his handgun back at the dinosaur.

Deadpool: Kakakakakakkakakakaka….? You idiot clone! I didn't know you were illiterate too!

DTB clone: Ka-

Deadpool: ZIP IT! GAH GENERATIONS IS DOOMED! IF ONLY DIGIMON TAMER B. WAS STILL ALIVE AND WITH US TODAY!

DTB: Hey guys!

Deadpool: ZOMBIE!

DTB: Nope, I'm just alive. AND ready to take another crack at Generations!

Deadpool: (points at clone) Then what do we need this guy for? (shoots clone in head.)

DTB:……………………… Good call.

Deadpool: 'COURSE IT'S A GOOD CALL! I made it after all.


	5. Chapter I Lost Count Oh right 5

Okay I've been in Mexico for a week for my reasons I won't say. So let's try and see if we can pick up.

Chapter 5: I Actually don't think Guilmon is a Rip-off of Agumon. Any Reference to this is Entirely Fictional

Deadpool was driving a bright red sports car. He had the radio turned up, and was bobbing his head as he sang along with it.

"I'm a barbie girl! In the Barbie World! Life in plastic it's fantastic! You can brush my hair, undress me everywhe…!"

CRASH!!!

The car crashed right into Growlmon's right foot in an explosion of fire, and sent Deadpool flying out the window, as the giant dinosaur grabbed his burnt foot.

"GAH!"

"That one hurt us both," Deadpool said to him, pulling a chunk of glass out of his forehead. "But my injuries will only last for a few minutes!"

He ran towards Growlmon, with both swords drawn and… was stomped flat.

"Y'know… I saw this comin' from a mile off," Deadpool said, as Growlmon looked down on him in the footprint. "Not sure why I didn't do anything about it."

BANG! BANG! BANG! Deadpool had his handgun out and was firing at the dinosaur.

"DIE AGUMON RIP OFF!" He cried.

"PYRO SPHERE!" Guilmon cried, and fired a burst of intense fire at Deadpool's left arm, and seared it right off. Deadpool stared down at his current stump.

"Hmmmm… There goes the best left arm I'll ever have. The one with the drink in it."

"Pyrosphere!"

"Ah!"

Deadpool scooped up his arm, and ran outside Guilmons little box thing. Outside he threw his arm on the stub.

"C'mon! C'mon! HEAL YOU WORTHLESS STUB! I'M GONNA BE BURNED TO HORRIBLE INJURY SINCE I CAN'T ACTUALLY DIE!"

Deadpool leapt on the roof to let his arm heal. He heard them look around for him.

"AH! Done! Now to OH MY GOD!"

"Guilmon look! He's up there!" Takato whispered, pointing up.

"What should we do?" The fanmade character asked.

"This. Digi-modify. Digivolution activate," Takato said, swiping a card. And Guilmon grew to an immense size. Then Takato heard something that made him glad, as Deadpool clearly didn't like what he saw.

"…OH MY GOD!"

The battle had taken the two to the streets, where Deadpool had taken the time to find a car he liked, hijack it, and crash it.

"That one hurt us both," Deadpool said to Growlmon, pulling a chunk of glass out of his forehead. "But my injuries will only last for a few minutes!"

He ran towards Growlmon, with both swords drawn and… was stomped flat.

"Y'know… I saw this comin' from a mile off," Deadpool said, as Growlmon looked down on him in the footprint. "Not sure why I didn't do anything about it."

Growlmon lifted his foot a bit higher.

"Aaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhh!" Deadpool cried, in the girliest voice of all time. He tapped his teleporter belt… and teleported directly next to the foot.

"Aw crap. Freakin' belt! Can't take one lousy giant stomp!"

Deadpool attempted to crawl away. The key word being ATTEMPTED. Growlmon kicked him.

"CRAP CRAP CRAP CRAP CRAP CRAP CRAP CRAP CRAP CRAP CRAP CRAP CRAP CRAP CRAP CRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAP!!"

He crashed into the window of a building, glass shards piercing his skin.

Growlmon walked over to him, preparing to roast him to death.

"Pyro-blaster!"

"Crap."  
The fireball hit him, and he felt his flesh burning like a hot dog on a campout.

"GYAAAH! HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT!!!!!!!!!" Deadpool screamed, running through the streets, burning alive. He looked around, and through a grenade at the nearest fire hydrant. It exploded, and he jumped into the streaming water, as it put him out.

"OH THANK GOD!" Deadpool said, as his flesh healed. "Oh great there goes my outfit. Now I've gotta go home and change. I WILL NOT KILL A CHARGE OF MINE IN A TORN OUT OUTFIT!" He yelled. In his head he thought, _Ah! The perfect excuse to get back to the hotels hot tub!_

Then of course he noticed the shadow around him. He looked straight up, eye to eye, with the giant red dinosaur.

"Cable… If you can hear me up in heaven, will you please save me? Like, I don't know, some kind of tank?"

BOOM!!!!

An ENOURMAS crater suddenly appeared, mere down the street. Growlmon and Takato, completely forgot about the mercenary in the excitement, and ran over to investigate. Deadpool, having NOT forgotten that they would remember him, and get back to beating the crap out of him ("Not that I can't take them, it's just I wasn't prepared for the Greymon rip off 2000 to show up," Deadpool reminded the audience.).

Takato and Growlmon made their way into the crater, to invesigate what could possibly have made something like that.

"Maybe it's a meteor. Or another digimon. Just we need! A new threat to top off that De…ad…ad… Oh……… my……… God," Takato said in pure shock.

"What is it, Takatomon?" Growlmon leaned down and asked him.

"It's… It's… Matt Ishidia… But with a hat!"

"That was the best ride ever. I love Disney World!"

DTB: Who is this new figure on the scene?

Deadpool: To those who don't read his other fics… START. It'll explain who this guy is so we don't have to.

DTB: Yeah you owe me that for continuing this one.

Deadpool: What's that supposed to mean? You were considering ending this one?

DTB: Well I've been busy. I'm just not sure how much I'll be able to update with all the schoolwork I've gotta due.

Deadpool: Look. I skipped an action figure deal for this stupid cross over, and YOU are going to finish it.

DTB: Yes sir.

Deadpool: Good, now get me my trailer!

Next time on Digimon Tamers and Deadpool:

Narrator: Previously on Digimon Tamers and Deadpool…

All this and more, on the next exciting chapter of… DIGIMON TAMERS, AND DEADPOOL!


	6. tahe6 pCr I'm running out of these

Previously on Digimon Tamers and Deadpool:

Narrator: All this and more, on the next Digmon Tamers and Deadpool.

Welcome to the next thingy.

Deadpool: I got a new necklace! (Holds up Jack Thompson's head attached to a chain)

DTB: GEEZ! What the hell!? Don't stick severed heads in my face just like that!

Chapter 6: Lifes to Short............ Let's Get Pissed Up

Jim Ishidia was sitting on the couch of one Takato. All he could do was stare out into space. He'd been there for 4 days. Rika and Takato had gotten into an argument. Well actually, Rika was beating Takato down verbally because he had made the unwise choice of mentioning what happened in the park. Ishidia meanwhile could only say two words.

"I TOLD YOU TO NEVER MENTION THAT!! AND YOU MENTION IT RIGHT IN FRONT OF SOMEONE!!"

"I'm sorry! It just... it just came out!"

"I'm... FICTIONAL?"

"THIS IS SO TYPICAL! I SAVE YOUR LIFE FROM A MANIAC AND YOU FEEL THE NEED TO BRING IT UP IN FRONT OF PEOPLE!!"

"But... But I just... i..." Takato said, his voice becoming quieter as he spoke, (as demonstrated by the fact he couldn't even capitalize his own i's when referring to himself).

"I'm _fictional_."

"YOU'VE GOT UNTILL TOMORROW TO MAKE SURE THAT HE DOESN'T REMEMBER IT OR I'LL RUN YOU DOWN WITH A LAWN MOWER!!!!!"

"B-b-b-b-but... I...," Takato stuttered. Rika SLAMMED the door as hard as she could. Takato could only stare, knees shaking in pure fear.

"I'm................................................... F-I-C-T-I-O-N-A-L?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!"

"Are you sure that was necessary?" Renamon asked her tamer.

"ABSOLUTELY!!" Rika yelled.

Henry was staring out at the city. Wondering. He just knew that Terriermon was being tormented by that freak. What was he doing to him?

"HOENEY! I'M HOME! I BROUGHT BOOZE!" Deadpool sang. He kicked the door open. He had 2 kegs and a six pack.

"What did you do today," Terreirmon spat at him from his cage.

"Let's see, had a drink, fought small red dinosaur, had arm burnt off, dropped drink due to arm being burnt off, attacked by slightly smaller and red version of Godzilla, kicked his ass but showed him mercy and let him get away."

"Yeah right," Terriermon said, folding his arms, and scowling. "I bet Growlmon kicked you through a window!"

Deadpool's eye twitched beneath his mask.

"Shut up and drink."

Deadpool opened the cage and thrust an open bottle into Terriermon.

"What's this?"

"Alcohol."

"Any ideas," Henry asked Rika. She had stopped by to discuss what their next move was going to be. Unfortunately she was still huffing over Takato. Both were so wrapped up in themselves, that neither was listening to the other one. Rika was muttering under her breath, and Henry was worried about Terriermon, and continued to talk about how he was worried about him.

"Who knows what that freak is doing to him!" Henry said.

"Stupid goggle wearing little..."

"Will he kill him? Is he going to torment him? What do we do?!"

"SWWWWWWWWEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEETTTTTTTTTTTT HOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMEEEEE ALABAMAAAAAAAAaaa... Weehee suck!" Deadpool said, laughing drunkenly. He had downed half a keg of beer in just one sitting, as opposed to Terriermon, who had only managed to get half a bottle down before joining him on the roof of the hotel and singing with him. He had to drink because Deadpool would have shoved him back in the cage if he didn't.

"Heh he heh heh heh," He giggled.

"Knock it off you sound like a crazy guy!"

"Momentai!"  
"OH NO YOU DIDN'!"

"I hate that stupid phrase!"

Deadpool pulled a pistol out and pointed it at his new drinkin' buddy, and pulled the trigger.

CLICK.

Both of them laughed insanely at it. Both of them were crossed eyes and rolling around on the ground, Deadpool sucked from a tube attached to the keg, and Terrerimon took a single gulp of his bottle.

"You know what we really need to do?"

"What?" asked Terriermon.

"Henry? Is that you?"

"Takato? What is..."  
"GIMMEE THAT PHONE!" Rika demanded. "Takato don't you dare...!"

"Rika, please not now, I really, really really need to talk to him, it's about the mercenary!"

Rika heard the desperation in Takato's voice.

"Ready?" Deadpool asked.

"Yeah."

"Channel...? OHMYGOD!!" Henry yelled, flicking the TV to the news. There were Deadpool and his best friend. Robbing a bank together.

Deadpool: HEY! I'm no theif! I'm a mercenary!

DTB: Your drunk. AND your crazy.

Deadpool: Ok, that's sort of believable, but why would Terriermon? He's only had a bottle and a half!

DTB: He's a real lightweight. Have you seen the size of the little guy?

Deadpool: Fine. But how's Hypno's gonna react to this?

DTB: I've gotta plan.

Deadpool: Yeah you better.

DTB: Hmmmm... I feel like I tried to hard for this one.


	7. Lucky Chapter 36

HOLY SHIT! I haven't updated this story since my last name! But wait… I've already deleted a story that one of my characters came from. How do we solve this problem?

Deadpool (sitting behind desk with a computer): The same way DC solved their Jason Todd problem folks. That's right; we want you to leave a review, stating whether you think the character Ishidia, first introduced in Digimon Generations, and later to this story in chapter… (clicks around on computer) chapter 5, should die, or live. He was never going to play an important role in the story anyway. So what do you think people? Does Ishidia get to live next chapter and just get sent home or something? Or does he become as dead as the fanfic he originated from? We're leaving it up to YOU!

Chapter 7: The End is Almost Nigh… I Think…

A large pile of beer cans was in the middle of Deadpool's hotel room. From beneath it, a man began to stir, and managed to bring himself up to a sitting position.

"Man… what beautiful morning. I feel GREAT! I feel fresh as a bagel. How about you rabbit boy?"

"UGH!" Terriermon groaned, clutching his head. "It feels like someone ripped out my brain, let a truck run over it, and then stuck it back into my skull!"

"That's called a hangover. And fortunately for me, I don't get those on account of me having this healin' factor thing."

"Yeah… where'd that big thing of money come from?"

* * *

"Oh god…" said Henry. He'd been up all night, watching the tape he'd made of Terriermon and Deadpool robbing the bank. He watched as Terriermon used his bunny blast to blow up a fortunately unoccupied police car.

"OH GOD…" he said.

"Henry, we should probably DO something, you've been watching this tape all night," Rika said.

"OH GOD!" He said, as the violence continued.

"Henry come on, we're going to find Deadpool," Takato said, prodding him.

"OH GOD!"

"… I kissed Takato," said Rika.

"OH G-… Really?" Henry said looking up.

"NO!" Rika yelled into his face. "Now get your digivice, we're going."

"Oh… oh right… I'm with you now… I've got it."

* * *

"Rooster Crow I… Well I know I was all over the news… Look, I had a few too many beers and… I'm sorry but… I… You… Yessir, finish it today or I'm fired…"

Deadpool hung up the phone, looking dejected. Terriermon was stumbling around, as Deadpool looked at him. He took some rope, and tied his ears together.

"Last night was fun little guy. See ya."

"See ya?" Terriermon said confused.

PUNT!

Deadpool kicked him out the window.

"!!!!!!!"

* * *

"You hear something?" asked Ishidia, who was hanging around with the tamers just in case it's decided to kill him off next chapter. Suddenly, Terriermon landed on his head, and he crumpled to the ground instantly.

"Terriermon!" Henry cried, near tears, immediately grabbing him and pulling him into a hug.

"Henry!" Terriermon yelled back, returning the hug.

"I'm in tremendous pain, thanks for asking…" Ishidia said from the ground.

"Stay RIGHT THERE!"

The Tamers heard the voice from up above they looked up. Deadpoo was glaring down at them. Then, down dropped a grenade.

"LOOK OUT!" Rika cried.

Everyone scattered, as the grenade exploded. When the smoke cleared, there stood Deadpool in all his glory.

"Sorry kiddies. Time to say buh-bye to the petting zoo rejects!"

* * *

Well everybody I think I'm ending this in a few chapters. Make sure to vote on wheter Ishidia lives or dies.


End file.
